Sorting
Still Pond - April 12, 2013 - Portland, OR
Today I helped with the sorting at my friend's apartment. The packing, the sifting, the cataloging, analyzing, and inventorying of a life. It is so hard.
Before going to do that, while CK attended a planning meeting for our fiend's memorial, I went out to skim the pond. It is a task that calls to me in our new home, definitely a work practice. Even as I lift pine needles off the surface of the water the wind blows new ones down, always more to be removed. I like the sound of the water dripping, the movement of the net made of silk screen material, finding the best method for collecting the needles and leaves.
Today I discovered that some of the water lilies we saw leaves for last summer have survived the winter and was lifting small, red leaves out from the murky bottom and up toward the sun.
Lily reaching up.
Emerging from dark water.
Spreading leaves sun-ward.
CK has written a very moving piece on her blog about our friend's death and about living with chronic illness (mental and/or physical) here.
Budding Lilacs
Damp Lilac Buds - April 12, 2013 - Portland, OR
Rain damp, ready to burst.
Clusters of sweet-scented jewels.
Dark lilac blossoms.
Stacking Stones
Cairn and Ferns - April 11, 2013 - Portland, OR
There is
A particular
Meditation
in the
Work
Of finding
Stones --
Smoothed,
Flat,
Rounded,
Perfect
For stacking.
Then setting
Oneself to
The careful
Balance.
Sunshine too Blithe
Rain & Sun - March 16, 2013 - Portland, OR
I lost a good friend yesterday, but couldn't really much beyond a daily poem. I'm sure I'll move on to feeling anger, but for now I just feel such a deep and profound grief. When I try to take too deep a breath it as though the pain rushes in.
Yesterday it was cold, grey, and chilly, which seemed fitting. This morning there was still grey, misty clouds clinging to the trees but by this afternoon the sun had burned off the clouds and it was gloriously sunny. I found myself feeling angry at that, feeling some understanding of Auden's Funeral Blues in a desire for cold, dark weather to match the hurt. A sunny spring day, resplendent with flowers, seems jarring.
In grief I find the
Sunshine to be too bright, too
Blithe for the moment
So Sorry for Your Loss
Dark Flowers - April 9, 2013 - Portland, OR
There are
Simply
No
Words.
Nothing even
Approaching
Adequate or
Meaningful,
Much less
Useful.
Nothing.
So
Sorry
For your
Loss.
Green Almonds
This weekend MC and I discovered green almonds at the fantastic market a new neighbor told us about, Barbur World Foods. They have all kinds of specialty foods from all over the world. I wasn't entirely surprised they would have green almonds in the produce section, but delighted to discover them!
The green almonds are fuzzy, delicate looking, and soft. You can peel them open with your finger nails to reveal the entirely white, soft almond inside. They have a texture similar to lychee, but not juicy. Somewhat grape-like, with a green, grassy, and somewhat tart note. I can see how they get used in a fresh, green gazpacho. They do taste of spring, of growth.
Green Almonds - April 8, 2013 - Portland, OR
After Winter's roots
Each taste of Spring revives a
Longing for Summer.
Fading
Fading Gerberas - March 17, 2013 - Portland, OR
The yellow flowers
Still grace the room with color
Even as they fade.
Evening Spring Sky
CK and I bought a new home this autumn. I think I knew I wanted to live here the moment I set foot in the kitchen. Large, great light, lots of space, and much better appliances. All that and most of the south wall had windows, sliding glass doors to a deck overlooking the trees in the yard, and a large window above the sink. As I enjoy doing things in the kitchen I get to watch the birds visit our yard to enjoy the seed we put out for them. It is so wonderful
Evening Sky - March 23, 2013 - Portland, OR
Rippling clouds against
A blue, late afternoon sky.
Near by, sparrows sing.
Spring Grows
Maple Start - March 31, 2013 - Portland, OR
Warming air bringing
Abundant life to surface.
Spring's wild abandon.
Sakura Appreciation
Autumn and Spring are my favorite seasons. During Autumn I'm convinced it is my absolute favorite, but then Spring arrives in Portland and the city bursts into a colorful display. When Spring arrives, I'm sure it is my favorite.
Sakura Shrub - April 4, 2013 - Wilsonville, OR
Riot of pale blossoms.
Morning's fragrant greeting
In chilly Spring air.