Like Words Together Reflections from the deep end of Practice.

28Nov/200

Late Night Slides

I'm going to teach another new workshop tomorrow, Yoga for Grief. Since it's new I didn't advertise it much at all beyond putting it on my newsletter. Four really wonderful people have signed up!

I feel both knowledgeable and like a complete fraud. Fairly normal, really. It feels very delicate stepping into this area, but use what I want to be doing!

So I'm up too late because I was checking over the slides I made. Another advantage to being online is having slides instead of a handout! In there morning I'll send a PDF to folks!

Gratuitous kitten in my hoodie shot!

27Nov/200

Still Thankful

For the first time since CK and I got together we had no guests over for Thanksgiving dinner. We've had anywhere from 1 to 15 guests each year for Friendsgiving.

A dear friend did pop by briefly with a few dishes for us to enjoy. We in turn sent home with her some of everything but the pies. Our fridge is chock full of tasty food!

Sending over meals was unplanned, but since we decided to make our classic dishes and had plenty, I thought to make up plates to send. CK and I both recalled saving some takeout containers. Then she asked if I saved the thermal bags her creamer gets delivered in!

The pies came from a different bakery and I got us each one! CK's has egg and dairy, mine is vegan. Both gluten free in an almond flour short crust style shell. This too helped since our favorite bakery closed and I was feeling really sad about it again, when I realized we didn't have a place for pies!

The kitten continues to delight us. He's teething and can be pretty bitey, but mostly he's a love.

26Nov/200

Teach Where You’re At

Last night I unexpectedly got a chance to teach yoga to people in person and it was really a great mood lifter!

I was doing our traditional Thanksgiving week late night grocery trip. This year CK stayed at home, she's only left the house 4 times since March.

I was complimented on how well the folks at the checkout could hear me through my MegaMask combo of a respirator-style mask with protection against aerosols and a cloth mask to filter my exhalations.

I commented that I'm, "Professionally loud!". I explained that as a yoga therapist who works with older adults, many of whom are low hearing, I strive to speak loudly and clearly.

The younger of the two commented that they had wanted to try yoga but were too worried about their back. I said that back's are a specialty because of my personal journey.

Then I taught the two folks helping me how to do "ledge dog", which is a downward facing dog using whatever sturdy ledge is at hand. In this case the checkout stand! Soon I had FOUR people doing it together and groans of relief were heard.

I passed out cards, told folks to sign up online for free videos.

Truly, a joy. The first in-person yoga I've taught since March.

The MegaMask is my featured image. It's a 3M respirator with filters for aerosols, this is what I also use when we have terrible smoke from forest fires. Over it I modified a very basic cloth mask from Athleta. It's been stitched along the bottom to help tighten it up around the 3M mask exhaust vent. This edge is then further taped down to ensure that my exhalation is filtered through a cloth mask. While I'm not ill, this signals to folks that this is what we all do when we care about each other.

24Nov/200

Goodbye Obie

Just realizing I totally forgot to post last night. No shame. I was really wrung out Sunday.

I was also worried about Obie. He'd been eating less and less on Friday and Saturday. On Sunday her barely at at all, not even pure kitten paté.

This morning he peed in front of CK in Bertie's old, beat up dog bed. When she tried to interrupt him her fell over to his side. He kept urinating, soiling his belly and feet. He then crouched on what's left of the sofa, not bothering to clean himself.

He was uninterested in food, wanting only you drink a little water. He would stretch out and his breathing was labored. It broke my heart a little when he'd occasionally make these small, rhythmic grunts.

Our excellent vet changed her afternoon schedule and got him in at 4:30. I, in my respirator with another mask over it, stayed with him. He was very peaceful, even on the short ride to the vet.

We thought through options and the risk to CK with the surging COVID rates right now. My going alone felt like the best decision, regardless how terrible.

I thought he was rallying again.

When I brought the new kitten home Obie took to him very quickly. Grooming him, playing a little. He let the kitten eat his food and play with his tail. He let the kitten into his treasure box of Good Trash.

Obie started to jump back up on the kitchen island again because the kitten food was so tasty. I was getting him to eat the medicated food for his urinary issue. He was lively and I got a couple more naps in with him too.

We feel like he got the kitten trained and then he was done.

I'm so glad I took a nap with Obie on Sunday.

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21Nov/200

Meltdown Day

Saturday the 21st, in which a discussion about fruit derails my entire day.

Some days I really hate my brain.

Today evening made me cry for most of the daylight hours leaving me with an even worse headache than yesterday. I ended up watching an anime movie I love, Nausicaä the Valley of the Wind and working up to eating food.

CK suggested I’m feeling burn out. I told her later that my brain’s immediate response to her saying that was, “I can’t be burnt out! I don’t have enough done yet!”

Getting the dishwasher loaded feels like a huge accomplishment. Likewise for getting the last of the instant mashed potatoes into food service containers.

Tomorrow will hopefully be easier.

21Nov/200

Rat, No Rat

The traps weren't sprung this morning. Bertie didn't go on alert all day.

We set one out in the pantry section of the garage, a place we've caught one before, and reset out the basement one.

Watching Ursa with toys we can tell he'd kill birds, bugs, amphibians, reptiles, and small mammals. He's far too tiny right now so we're keeping him away.

20Nov/200

Rat vs. Sofa

We still have a rat in the house somewhere.

We have disassembled our terrible sofa. It didn't help us get rid of the rat, but we found droppings under it after Bertie alerted on it tonight.

Tomorrow I talk to the junk haulers. CK is ordering a sofa with legs making it is easier to clean beneath. We're pulling the pieces out of the house and covering.

Our hated of the sofa and the rat overwhelmed us and we took the horrid thing apart. We reached a point where we just wanted it gone! We decided against dragging the three large pieces out of the house in the dark!

CK set up traps. We've got them on each floor.

Tonight feels like this year's just continuing to be dramatic as fuck.

19Nov/200

Autumn Rats

Several years ago, as Autumn got truly wet and cold, a young rat broke into the house. Puck caught and killed it. He was proud forevermore.

There's a rat in the house.

Bertie alerted to it downstairs. We tried to keep it down there, and our animals away from it, by closing the door. We deployed a trap in a box, adding an additional layer of impediment to one of the dogs trying to grab it..

Instead of going for the box it has come upstairs. I saw after doing dishes, running across the living room.

I've put the trap upstairs. I'm in the yoga room with the kitten.

This year. Of course this year we get the repeat of a rat.

Kitten news: sitting close to Obie on a chair!

18Nov/200

Kitten Induced Terror

This morning the kitten flipped himself through the stairwell rails and dropped several feet onto the hardwood stairs. He then ran into the basement and hid while growling.

I thought I would throw up when I realized what happened.

Brow and I both ran down the stairs. Bertie fell down part of the steps he was rushing. He fell again coming up because he was worried.

I felt this terrible shame that is failed to keep the kitten safe. Certain CK would get angry that I wasn't careful.

Ursa seems fine. CK wasn't mad, she reminded me that he's inadvertently knocked himself off the bed twice.

She got why I felt so bad.

Power went out again too. This led to pizza for dinner.

Still feeling sad and demoralized. My students shared today that most of them are feeling the same.

Today the kitten slept with Dora, which was pretty great.

17Nov/200

Not Yet Hopeful

Thank goodness for goofy dogs, tiny kitten, and continued stability for Cancer Kitty.

I'm watching Democratic celebration talk with weariness. I'm not yet feeling hopeful about this country much less celebrating it.

I fought hard to keep from falling into anger again today, but it felt like a huge effort top stay merely blue.